30 Minus 2 Days of Writing (2014)
Day 14: “It has to be aliens”
________________________________________
On September 21, 2013, I married Diana, the love of my life. We had been dating for nearly ten years before we finally got hitched. In all the time that we had been together, Diana constantly begged me to write a “mushy and romantic” blog entry in which I discussed the many ways that I loved her. For one reason or another, I kept refusing, and I never gave in. I came close to honoring her request once, but then I turned it into one big joke.
Category: Diana
Long Live Queen Nicky
30 Minus 2 Days of Writing (2014)
Day 4: “When hell freezes over”
________________________________________
Hey, how’s it going? This is Diana, KZ’s wife. My stupid husband got the story entirely wrong with that atrocity of a poem, “A Song of Goudas and Grays“. This is the real story of the Queen of Cheeses.
The Semantics of Bear Attacks
30 Minus 2 Days of Writing (2014)
Day 2: “It was no accident”
________________________________________
What does it mean to be “eaten by a bear”? That seems like a relatively straightforward question at first glance, but there is a lot of nuance underlying the deceptive simplicity.
Who is Mouthy?
So, what’s the deal with that paper mouth, anyway? People have been asking me this question a lot lately. For those of you not in the know, Mouthy is a hexagonal paper hand puppet traditionally fashioned out of the protective chopstick sleeves found at numerous Asian restaurants. Mouthy is smart, quick witted, smooth as hell,…
A Weekend of Love
On September 21, 2013, I married Diana, the love of my life. Thank you so much to everybody who could be in attendance that night. And even if you couldn’t be there, thank you just the same for your support and well wishes. My one regret of the night is that I didn’t get a…
The Ballad of Shudo
30 Minus 2 Days of Writing
Day 20: “The Other Shoe”
________________________________________
We’ve all heard the stories about Bilbo Baggins and his storied nephew, Frodo. But there is a lesser-known hobbit named Shudo who once dared to defy the oppressive will of the Dark Lord, Sauron.
Winning Without Trying (Reposted)
30 Minus 2 Days of Writing
Day 16: “Music”
________________________________________
Recently one weekend, while Diana and I were driving home after running some errands, we got into the usual argument over which radio station we were going to listen to. At some point, I relented and let Diana choose the music. Even though Diana eventually got her way, I’d still like to think I came out ahead during this particular exchange. This was the day that I won without even trying.
Shopping Bags and Domestic Spats
30 Minus 2 Days of Writing
Day 15: “Or else”
________________________________________
There is a citywide ordinance in San Jose, California which bans retailers from issuing plastic carryout bags to customers. This requires shoppers in San Jose to either carry around reusable shopping bags, or to buy a recycled paper bag at each store for a token fee. While I appreciate the fact that San Jose is attempting to be environmentally responsible with this ordinance, I do have to point out that the plastic bag ban has resulted in a sharp increase of frustrating domestic spats.
The Giant Crab Dream
30 Minus 2 Days of Writing
Day 3: “And the next thing I knew”
________________________________________
Many years ago, my fiancée, Diana, had a nightmare about being chased by a giant crab. She told me about this dream back in the earliest days of our relationship when we were still in our initial dating phase. The worst part about Diana’s crab nightmare is that she has no recollection of ever dreaming it. She is, of course, completely full of crap.
When KZ Proposed to Diana
For those of you who haven’t yet heard, Diana and I got engaged back in September. People have been asking me to tell them the story about how I popped the question, but there’s really not much to tell. It was a simple proposal. I took Diana to the local pub, pulled out my bat’leth,…