Kevin: come to the dark side Tara: only if there’s good food there Kevin: excellent food Kevin: filet of tomato Kevin: prime potato Kevin: carrot chops Tara: LoL Kevin: rack of celery Okay, so off the cuff, I’m not very good at naming vegetarian dishes. I should work on improvising.
525,600 Minutes
To Those Who Have Found My Blog Through Yahoo and Google:
I’m sorry that I muddled up your search and diverted your attention from what you were originally looking for. I have no pictures of Rocky J. Squirrel, no gray comforters for sale, nor even pictures of Pamela Anderson or Dr. Aki Ross in a bikini. I only wish I could offer you a “‘go screw…
Didja Hear?
The war with Iraq was resolved peacefully. Such an unexpected and unprecedented event has inspired all the world’s nations, and now world peace has been officially declared. Just kidding. April Fools!
Next Time, I’ll Wear a Thicker Jacket
Hooray for fevers that incapacitate you all week long during spring break.
I’d Choose Neither if I Could
‘Despair or folly?’ said Gandalf. ‘It is not despair, for despair is only for those who see the end beyond all doubt. We do not. It is wisdom to recognize necessity, when all other courses have been weighed, though as folly it may appear to those who cling to false hope. Well, let folly be…
Most Memorable Things That Were Said This Week
“Sex is a normal part of the human experience. We all want it. We all need it. Now I’m not saying I’m human, but that’s how I advocate the human experience. (after being told that mamae is a variation of “mother” in Portuguese) “God I know. It’s so obvious. It’s not like I thought it…
At Least I’ll Have Tangoed at All
Apparently somebody I know has a thing for me. Either that, or somebody suspects that I have a crush on him or her. This is the third time in the past two years that I’ve received a notification from a secret admirer site. Now what I want to know is, who the heck keeps marking…
Wow
Lawmakers on Capitol Hill are pushing hard to make changes that really matter. Their latest successful effort: renaming food items on House cafeteria menus. French fries are now “freedom fries,” and French toast henceforth shall be known as “freedom toast.” The repercussions of this public snubbing will be felt for years to come. Good job,…
So Not Punk Rock (An Homage to Sarah B.)
Friend: now i get so damn repulsed Friend: i look through clothing catalogues and go to stores and punk is all trendy Friend: it sickens me Friend: really, it does Kevin: not sure i know what punk is about, but i know what you mean Friend: well, were you ever punk? Kevin: if you consider…