To Gain and Lose (Reposted)

30 Minus 2 Days of Writing (2013)
Day 4: “Friendship”

Life is a seamless collection of hellos and goodbyes. They stitch together the totality of our days, and they have a way of tearing us apart until nothing remains but memories, and the hollow sting of lingering regret. The start of each new day brings the promise of a thousand hellos — thousands of first times and anxious introductions. Yet just beneath the surface of every meaningful meeting lies the inevitability of loss, heartache, and a bitter farewell, whether by death, or by some trivial variant of a piddling manmade catastrophe. Even so, despite the promise of pain, we dare each day to put our hearts on the line with a fresh set of ill-fated beginnings.

It is intrinsic to our nature that we place our faith in the uncertain currents of human connections. Each day we cast out our nets lined with hopeful hellos, driven by the eagerest of human needs to feel a little less alone. Above all other things in the spectrum of human experience – love, joy, sorrow, regret – loneliness is among the strongest human motivators the world has ever known. We exist to live and to love as briefly and imperfectly as we know how to for the sake of keeping loneliness at bay. Throughout the course of a lifetime, we bring happiness and meaning to the lives of others — and somewhere along the way, they lose us, and we lose them, and our maddening capacity for love and pain overwhelms us and brings us to our knees, as if in prayer, as if in contrition for having ever dared to care for another.

The prospect of loss is a somber inevitability, a song that we are all compelled to sing from start to finish. There are no exceptions, and there is no escape. No amount of struggling can change the fact that we all eventually sing along to that sad refrain.

Still, even with the promise of pain awaiting us at the end, we carry on as best as we can to muddle through our days, insisting with the sincerest of hopes that life was not meant to be lived alone. For all of the injustices and imperfections to be encountered in life, living wouldn’t be worth half as much if we never had the opportunity to gain and lose. It’s only natural that we would lament our every loss, but let us never neglect to celebrate our gains, our hopeful introductions, the times when our lives intertwine in some meaningful way to enrich our existence, to grant us the gifts of warmth, laughter, unbridled joy, and the comforting promise of better days to be seen ahead, of companionship and assurance in the least likely of places.

In spite of all reason, and in spite of pain, we should dare to celebrate what joy there is left to find in the remainder of our diminishing days. That is, at least, how I would choose to live my life. So here’s to those whom we wish were still a part of our lives. And here’s to those loved ones whom we haven’t yet lost. There is so much more joy awaiting us on the horizon if we would only afford ourselves the patience to reach it.

Hello, my friends — old and new. I’m glad you could join me.

30 Minus 2 Days of Writing (2013)
A painful exercise in forced inspiration brought to you by
“We Work for Cheese“