What’s all this crap we’re hearing about Alabama? In a largely symbolic gesture, some courthouse in Alabama was ordered by US federal courts to remove a tall, granite monument of the Ten Commandments from the lobby. Predictably, this pissed off plenty of Christians, who have resolved to set things right and to get that TWO…
Category: Topical
Redefining What it Means to Be an American
I’m an American. I’m also Chinese. But don’t think for a second that I’m a second-class citizen. And for that matter, nobody should feel that way about themselves, either. The other day, while in conversation with my mother, I learned that one of her Asian friends “married an American man.” In other words, some oriental…
Didja Hear?
The war with Iraq was resolved peacefully. Such an unexpected and unprecedented event has inspired all the world’s nations, and now world peace has been officially declared. Just kidding. April Fools!
I’d Choose Neither if I Could
‘Despair or folly?’ said Gandalf. ‘It is not despair, for despair is only for those who see the end beyond all doubt. We do not. It is wisdom to recognize necessity, when all other courses have been weighed, though as folly it may appear to those who cling to false hope. Well, let folly be…
Wow
Lawmakers on Capitol Hill are pushing hard to make changes that really matter. Their latest successful effort: renaming food items on House cafeteria menus. French fries are now “freedom fries,” and French toast henceforth shall be known as “freedom toast.” The repercussions of this public snubbing will be felt for years to come. Good job,…
Absolutely Nothing
All over campus I see people walking around with handwritten signs attached to their backpacks that read, “NO WAR.” Now I’m not a big fan of Bush’s calls for war myself, but I find it hard to take these silly little signs seriously. To be fair, I do respect the people that bear these…
Smoke From All Around
I’m sick of hearing about sports fans that riot after a big game. Are people’s lives so bankrupt that they feel the need to break shit every time a major sporting event comes to an end? I don’t know what the situation was like in Tampa Bay, but I do know that, after the Super…
On Casting the First Stone
I don’t believe in Hell, but I’d sure like to believe in a kind of public Purgatory in which all of the deceased assholes of the world are set on display in medieval stocks. On our way to Heaven, all of us decent folk would get the chance to walk by and kick each of…
The Lighter Side of International Affairs
Am I the only one that pictures a sassy blond woman every time I read a news article that refers to Ariel Sharon as simply “Sharon?”